Now Parents, Brad Pitt And Angelina Jolie Both Still Way Doable

Breaking News! Hordes of fans gather across the street from a house in the Northern Alps of Itally, where Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were spotted on the deck eating what appeared to be crepes. "At least, that's what this guy was saying," said one bystander. "And then it just kind of spread like wildfire." The bystander decided to see if he could get a peek because, although Pitt and Jolie "are parents and all that, they are both still way doable." Another bystander questioned said he wanted to see if the camera contributed to the size of Jolie's breasts, while his girlfriend wanted to determine if Pitt's face was as porous as the editors of People Magazine have claimed.

Midwest Bumpkin Visits California Only To Find Herself Naked

Whoa...where did she come from? A friend--and other friends, take note--e-mailed me the, um, titillating shot. Basically, the story is that this chick was visiting from some town in the Midwest, met a photographer (a friend of my friend who, as a friend, passed it along to me), and he, being a sly dog, persuaded her to pose for some model shots.

What do you think? Does she have a chance?

My First Photo, Testing 1,2,3.

Step off, snowboarding bitches. Claiming? Heyo!

I'm not a blog apologist, just for the record.

But I just had to let myself know (since I'm the only who has ever read this thing), that the Mitch Allan interview I posted, like, a couple years ago -- um, yeah, I don't know why I did that. Did you hear that self? I said I don't know.

The thing is, the music of SR-71 or Mitch Allan is a type of rock that I am not particularly fond of. When I interviewed him he was a pleasant enough fellow, and a handsome devil to be sure. He even was dating some hot Charlie's Angels chick (the asian one, you know, the hottest one) at the time.

And boy did he know how to work the camera! Blue Steel, Magnum, he knew all the poses.

Limewire: A Love-Hate, But Mostly Love, Pastime.

I'll admit it: I use Limewire. Wait, don't I care about musicians getting what they deserve, profit and money?

The answer is yes, I would like that very much.

Here's the catch: I don't have any money. What little money I do have, it goes to bills like the internet and rent and gas -- these days especially gas. So when it comes to buying music -- oh, I can't download clothes or limited edition sneaks, either -- it's, well, low on the totem pole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, the whole music revolution, the industry is a changing, right, I've heard it (I've also download the yeah yeah yeahs just to be clear). But do I have to be the one to help change it? I mean, there's poor people in third world countries being exploited by capitalist money mongers, there's civil unrest in Darfur, there's scams-a-many in Nigeria, and who gives two shits about those palestinians...right? Right?

I know, I know, it's the little things that make a difference. Like recycling. My girlfriend is always getting bent out of shape when I get lazy and throw a can or plastic bottle into the regular trash instead of the recycables bin. Yet I'm not too lazy to download free music. Hmm. Something about my integrity isn't adding up. I might just have a case of the indifferences. Very serious, I hear, and it can lead to apathy and personal selfishness, even deadlier societal diseases.

But until then, it's off to Limewire! And just so I don't feel too bad about it, I'll try to remember to throw my soda in the correct receptacle. Ah ha! One right makes you forgot about one wrong ...